We force a smile and work alone to find solace. Comfort. Peace. Pretending to be happy, productive, pulled-together and in control. We mask our empty well with brittle exteriors, hiding from others; and from ourselves. Truth is, inside we’re all hurting. We’re all deficit. We all want to make it stop, and are desperate for ways.

How we sooth this unbearable ache is determined by our mindset; our core beliefs; our values and perceptions of the meaning and purpose of life.

While most believe in God, not all understand how to relate to Him, or are afraid of His power. These run away, clawing at anything that fits their grasp, hoping it won’t crumble. When hope implodes, they become dejected, lost and aimlessly floating in search of that which never satisfies.

Those who humble themselves to God our creator, don’t run. They stand, embracing the cry as a call. A call to the Father. Humility. Worship. Intimacy. Accepting need of Him. Baring our hearts, we admit our ache, our helplessness, our dependency on God for strength and sustenance. It is in Him that we live and move and have our being. (Acts 17:28)

We reach for God, receiving strength from him like parched land in Spring rain. Remembering His precious sacrifice, His mercy, grace and redemption. We come to Him, the creator of love, and the only life-giver able to fill the void to overflowing. We receive His undying love like a flood through our souls; an abundance of what our heart cries out for; enough to share with the lost and the hurting.

Alas, we are filled.

c) 2010 JL Ryan – All Rights Reserved

How to See God: 1 Corinthians 2

(c) 2009 Jenna Ryan

PLEASE READ THIS VERSE. It was written over 2000 years ago by Paul, as led by he Holy Spirit. The text explains how to understand and see God; and why He can’t be found by intelligence.

If you want to see God, you must look through spiritual eyes. God is a spirit, and you can’t see Him with just your brain. The reason God created us like this is so we would go beyond our human intelligence, far beyond the spectrum of the mind. Higher level. Higher plane. The Spirit is life. Life without the Spirit is like a body without breath.

It is the Spirit of God that reveals His majesty. It is in this realm that we not only come to Him, and experience His power, but are invigorated with new understanding of His purpose, plans and principals. It is by and through this Spirit that the relationship unfolds. We find, engage and understand God through the Spirit, not the mind.

It is this Spirit that saves us, sustains us and stimulates us as we ever reach for greater understanding of who God is, why He does what He does, and where He is taking us. As we search the Spirit, we learn the answers to the mysteries. Those of us who are diligent, devoted and eager to learn–God is generous to share the richness of His treasure, which in turn, renews the mind.

1 Corinthians 2

And when I came to you, brothers, I did not come proclaiming to you the testimony of God with lofty speech or wisdom. For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified. And I was with you in weakness and fear and much trembling, and my speech and my message were not in plausible words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, that your faith may not rest in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

Wisdom from the Spirit

Yet among the mature, we do impart wisdom, although it is not a wisdom of this age, or of the rulers of this age, who are doomed to pass away. But we impart a secret and hidden wisdom of God, which God decreed before the ages for our glory.

None of the rulers of this age understood this, for if they did, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory.

But as it is written:

What no eye has seen, nor ear hath heard,
nor the heart of man imagined,
what God has prepared for those who love Him.

These things God has revealed to us by the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God. For who knows a persons thoughts except the spirit of the person which is in him? So also, no one comprehends the thoughts of God, except the Spirit of God.

Now we have not received the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand the things freely given us by God. And we impart this in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those who are spiritual.

The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned. The spiritual person judges all things, but is himself to be judged by no one. For who has understood the mind of the Lord, so as to instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ.

This weekend was wonderful. I attended a fabulous Retreat in Canton, Texas with the women from my new church, Genesis Metro. I knew I would enjoy the weekend, but had no idea how deep God would take me on this journey. First of all, I met many open, loving and kind women who seemed to have no agenda other than to be kind and loving to me and the other 72 women in attendance.

The goal of the retreat, according to the pastor’s wife, was to connect with each other, connect with God and determine the “Games” being played out in our lives that sabotage our walk with the Lord and steal our joy. The camaraderie of the ladies, the preaching of the word, the corporate worship and the memorable activities caused the truth of my heart to unravel like yarn across the floor. It didn’t happen all at once, but steadily by the ministry of the Holy Spirit.

My own issue? Control. I’ve never been called a “Control Freak;” that’s not my personality type. But it turns out I still had problems with control. God wasn’t leading me–I held the reigns. My fear that God wouldn’t, or couldn’t take care of me was a block that needed to be dealt with.

None of my own efforts to control and run my own life have been successful. Based on my track-record, the likelihood that my future would benefit in my own hands was nil. How hopeless is it to continue striving, trying, pushing, pulling and shoving to get what God already freely gives? That’s when I realized, control is ugly.

My heart softened there, in the cool breeze of October, amidst the sunny skies of Texas. People I barely knew shared riveting stories of affairs, cancer, abuse and self-hatred. It was through this transparency that I gained strength to examine my own sin against God.

Growing up as a daughter of a heroin addicted father, and with a single-working mother, I learned early-on that I had to take care of myself. If I was hungry, I had to find my own food somehow. If I needed clothes, I had to get a job–which I did at 12 years old. I learned how to take care of me without relying on any other.

My grandmother taught me to be independent. While good at taking care of myself from a very early age–something was lost. I never experienced the feeling of being taken care of by a loving father. Many times we associate God with our parents, and in my eyes, deep down in my honest places, I found that I didn’t think God could really take care of me–that I had to finagle things; to work and manipulate to control things on my own. I didn’t trust God.

Instead of resting and allowing Him to work out His will in me, I do the opposite: plan, scheme and manipulate to make things happen in my own timing. This never works. It only leaves me frustrated and dejected, all the while blaming God for my mistakes. Perhaps even ditching His plan all together, pushing me farther from His promises. This cycle has repeated itself over and over again through the years and caused me pain beyond description. It’s stupid. It’s sin.

It had to stop. I had to hand all control over to the Lord Jesus so that I could be set free. I had to choose to believe that God alone is my provider, and He is willing and able to take care of me–and that he wants to do so. So, day-by-day, song-by-song, word-by-word, prayer-by-prayer, step-by-step and testimony-by-testimony, I slowly began admitting my weakness, my need to control.

I need “self-control to give up control.”

Day two the group got together to perform a variety of tasks together as a team. Each of several groups received our own cross. We ended up carrying this very heavy cross for a long ways and performed different tasks at each station. We had to keep at least one hand on the cross at all times. First, we played tug-o-war, then we moved onto to the zip line, and then to the paddle-boats.

Eventually we all ended up together, walking with the crosses on large poles up a hill where we found a treasure box. Inside the box was a bunch of solid blocks, each about four inches wide. Each of us had our own block with our name etched beautifully into the center. I noticed how pretty my name looked on the block. I wanted to keep it as a reminder, but that was not the purpose. We were to write our sin on the back of the block and nail it to the very large, 25 foot wooden cross that lay on the ground at the base of the little hill.

I took the black marker and wrote on the back of it: CONTROL. Suddenly my heart was cognizant of the reality of what my own sin was doing to my relationship with God. The air grew to a hushed silence as all 72 ladies bowed to the ground in repentance. God’s presence was thick on that hill overlooking that a little pond in Canton, Texas. We each took our time reflecting on our actions and the ugliness this block represented.

One by one, we nailed it to the cross forever. You could hear the pounding of the hammers as we each nailed our sins thereupon. After each the blocks were placed, we erected it as a team, and secured it with wooden stakes. (I’ll get a copy of the pic, hopefully.)

The towering cross against the backdrop of the sky heightened the moment. I could see my name from the ground where I was kneeling. I knew, at that moment, what I had given up was a life of misery. I would never get it back. God is in control and He will take care of my needs. My sins were nailed to the cross, like the one (Christ Jesus) who bore my sin for me. I can stop striving.

I will never forget what I learned, and I now know that He will never forget me.

“For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord.
Plans to prosper you, not to harm you;
to give you a hope and a future.”

~ Jeremiah 29:11

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, and in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path. Proverbs 3:5-6

 

I don’t know about you, but I like to understand everything. When I don’t understand what’s going on in my life, or can’t answer certain questions about my future, I get anxious. I’m a CEO, a business woman–a human being in the Twenty-First Century! I want to know my options A, B, C or D so I can make quick decision. Give me the problem, I’ll figure out what the “X” is and solve it. Chop, chop. That’s my personality.

Unfortunately life’s tests don’t play by the rules. Real scenerios don’t have the same solutions as multiple-choice tests. Sometimes when there is no answer, or the variables to the equation are out of our control. Here the answer to the test question is not can you solve the problem, but can you live without solving it. Ouch! Not solve the problem? That’s so contrary to my human fabric.

Not solving a problem is like not scratching an itch, dragging your feet when you walk or not shaving your armpits (ladies). For me, leaving a problem just flapping in the wind is unnerving. I want to SQUASH it, learn from it and move on.

Impatience is: “I want an answer and I want an answer now, even if it’s the wrong answer–just give me an answer so I can feel better.” It’s finding peace in knowing what’s next instead of trusting God with our every waking breath. My need to quickly resolve my problems is to blame for many of the mistakes I’ve made. Impatience causes us to fall off the path that God has set for us.

Rash decisions made at the height of impatience can include anything. Some of us would say, “they didn’t choose me because I’m not good enough.” Others would say, “Well, it’s not here, I guess it will never get here.” Or, “my son will never get off drugs so I might as well just give up on him.” There are any number of rash decisions we can make to hurry up and solve life’s problems with an answer, even if it’s the wrong answer.

Patience, in my mind is being able to live in a state of perpetual “non-understanding” when it comes to some things that are beyond my control. It’s having the discipline to endure the nagging heart wanting immediate answers. Patience is letting go of that which you cannot control while leaning on the only one really in control. It’s about remaining hopeful instead of negative in the face of mystery. It’s about knowing that your Father in heaven loves you and is “working all things out for your good” (Romans 8:28).

Patience requires you to first have faith in God.

Problems are rampant in life, but we’ve got to learn to stop trying to fix those problems out of our control. We’ve got to come to the place where we surrender our worries, questions, needs and desires to God. We have to turn to Him for direction instead of looking to our own abilities to fix and solve every equation we face. This is where God wants us to be, looking to Him for everything. Only when we relenquish our need to solve everything on our own will we be ready for the answers that God has for us.

Here’s a song by Brooke Frasier, “Arithmetic” that suits the occasion. God bless!

Please comment! I love comments! I’m so glad you’re here!

By: JL Ryan August 26, 2009

There are those who consider themselves Christians, but are actually using “religion” as an accessory–a way to make them look better on the outside. They have no true relationship with God or His people. No power or victory. Repentance or transformation. No passion. No renewal. Like stagnant waters, they neither receive the love of God, nor give it to others. Sure, they may attend a church service–but that’s it. They won’t let God inside. It’s like garnishing a necklace once a week for show, and stowing it away for real life.

All the while we have a loving Heavenly Father, with a heart aching to spend time with these, His wayward children! If they only knew what He has for them! And perhaps they don’t. Perhaps they need someone to tell them. If this is you, let me testify personally of the goodness of God. He is so much more than an accessory! He is worthy of everything. Everything you have. Every day. Every minute. Every second. He is worthy.

God loves us so much! He does. Each and every one of us miraculously are the “apple of His eye.” (Ps 17:8) All He asks is that we give ourselves over to Him. He does this for our own good. It is only when we seek Him with our whole hearts, that we can see Him for who He really is and experience all that He’s promised. Peace, prosperity, favor, blessing, renewal, transformation, adoption, eternal life. Just to name a few! These things are not available to us unless we get serious and seek Him with our whole hearts.

As true Christians, we’re not called to put on airs, but to lay things down. Our lives. Our burdens. Our cares. It’s not about looking better, but humbling ourselves, admitting our need of Him. In exchange God–by His Spirit, adorns us for our journey. Beauty for ashes. (Is 61:3) Joy for mourning. A crown. The helmet of salvation, the sword of the spirit and the shield of faith. (Eph 6:10-18) The paradox is this: In giving up our way of living, we gain life more abundantly.

Brothers and sisters, God sent me to tell you. He loves you with an everlasting love. There is nothing on earth that you’ve done that will keep Him from loving you. No matter where you’ve been, He still wants you to know Him. Give your life to Him. Not just a sliver of you–but ALL of you. Give Him yourself every day. Every morning you wake up, lay your life down at His beautiful feet. Receive His great exchange. He will crown you with His tender mercies, and your children, and your children’s children. Nothing, oh nothing can compare.

My heart tells me to just sit back and let Him work His will in my life. It’s hard for me, but He’s given me peace. He wants me to trust Him. My heart knows, and is finally at rest.

So find me here, in the stillness of His love.

But you have chosen the more excellent way. Your heart may shatter, but still you press-in. It’s uncomfortable; you squirm, but still you reach. Inhale His presence; exhale self.

Like a child your soul waits for him, or a long lost brother. It is in this waiting that the divine relationship unfolds. The Word becomes flesh and dwells in you. Your broken soul is transformed into fertile soil. You rejoice in your trials knowing that your discomfort brought you to the greatest vantage point of all–prostrate on the ground.

And it is in this simple place of utter dependence that you meet Him in spirit and truth, and where you can truly see. He is King.

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I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in
his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, Phillipians 3:10

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Jenna Ryan
(c) All Rights Reserved
March 14, 2008